Shashin

Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds Part 1

I happen to come across some LSD last night while getting super baked with friends. Admittedly, it's not that my life has been uneventful but I've been too busy experimenting with drugs that I haven't had the time to write at all. Not that anybody reads this shit anyways, but you know, it's here. I'm stoned now and procrastinating on showering and eating for the first time today. So I'll post some picture of some random crap from being stoned and what not. 

Love You ♥

Been Gone or Lost

So I know it's been a while since I last blogged and that is literally all because I have a med card. Yeah I started smoking in the name of being in love and broken. Before I was called the perfect person. According to the love of my life, I am smart, nice, athletic, and talented. Why the fuck are you with someone else???
Now I have a drug problem. I haven't had a day of sober in about two to three months. I take edibles before class, hit blunts, bongs, pipes, and pieces in between classes, and dabs before "sleep". Before yesterday, I hadn't slept in about four to five days. The only reason I did sleep was because I got dabbed out at a dispensary after buying and still smoked afterwards.
My heart has been in lot's of pain lately. I don't think I can handle all of this. I love what I can't have. It's been over half a year, and now I can't even be sober.
Why do I love you. I have no idea, but I fucking do, and there's nothing I can do about it, I have lost.
I Love You ♥ I'm sorry.

Been a While

Fucking shit I haven't blogged in a long ass time. Ain't that some shit. Well yea, I have a med card now. I stone a lot. I'm currently writing this on an edible. I want to blame that for my lack of blogging, but I know it is just me being busy and putting it aside for school which is okay, or for getting high which is still okay but not as prudent a decision.

This I've been doing lately include joining break dance club. I'm actually pretty decent at it and everyone's really friendly.We practice from 7-10 pm anywhere with a nice ground like an indoor basketball court. 

The situation with my love has been in a stale mate with only a few new interesting developments. I was stalked me has forcibly made me hang out. Luckily I was stoned throughout all of it. Another thing is I was slapped in the face and kicked in the ribs. Then my daughter was brought into this. My daughter also slapped me and I haven't talked to her since.

I had a strange streak of being really nice today. I was breakdancing when I decided to go to the apt to get a drink and noticed a girl on the 3rd floor crying. So I literally went up there and comforted her. Also, I was asked for a cigarette by 2 random guys and I asked my RA if he had any but didn't. So I gave them a fat blunt each for free. Nobody does that shit. The last was someone posting something on the club's facebook page to see if anyone was in the school and wanted to hang out. I replied to a total stranger on facebook with an offer to hangout and since it was also his birthday, I took him out to eat. What the fuck even.

Calc is hard as all shit that class will be the end of me. English is pretty easy I just need to manage my time better and learn to be a productive stoner. Japanese is getting into kanji and shit so I have a kanji test tomorrow that I'm so not ready for >..< Dance 101 is nothing but line dancing and what not. The teacher happens to be our club adviser as well.

I went home this past weekend and stoned my twin out. It was pretty fun. Spent the night with a friend and barely got calc hw done when I should have been doing my essays and journal. But I was way too fucking tired.

I haven't been sleeping for shit. All I do is watch shit all day and breakdance. I need to start getting into the habit of either not stoning if I have work to do or being able to work while stoned. I'm writing this while I should be doing my essay and I'm stoned so obviously this shall take some work. I'll get there though.

I'll post pictures of some of my stuff later. I feel like I owe that much. Not like anyone reads this thing anyway. But if so, leave some comments or something. Back to writing this fucking essay >..<

Still Love You ♥

Issues + med card

Lately I've been having issues especially with the one I like. My Love and I haven't been talking for a while now and well I still feel the same. But we were supposed to have the same dance class this semester and I my Love didn't show, turns out, my love dropped the class. Most likely it's because I'm in it. And I know I'm the one who started ignoring and avoiding first but what fucking else can I do. My Love is taken by another and is treated like shit and second to video games and bull shit. It pisses me the fuck off. I've been having anxiety problems, anorexia and bulimia relapses, and insomnia. So I decided to get my medical marijuana card. It was so fucking easy to get like sure I have legit problems but some dude went in and said his wrists hurt and that was all. He still got it. This only temporarily solves my problem though, because when I'm high, I won't know there's a problem. But deep down inside, I know I'm totally fucked.
I Still Love You  ♥ It's rather kind of sad though.

Irvine Visit for Larper

This weekend was pretty nice. I've been feeling like shit due to said Love interest and I fuckin hate it. We're not even talking anymore and it hurts. So I decided to visit Larper in UC Irvine. I learned some new things like how to play "rage cage" which is an  awesome drinking game. I got totally hammered it was crazy. I was told I did things I don't even remember doing >..< So that means I had a good night xp But that next day hang over headache is terrible. I spend all day feeling like shit and wanting to nap but I couldn't. Before I left Irvine, Larper and I decided to visit the Spectrum. The Spectrum is an utterly badass out door mall that's just womps on any I've ever been to before. I got some new septum piercings at a Hot Topic and I got some T.U.K Creepers too (which I've been wanting for literally fucking ever xO) This weekend was actually pretty decent thanks to that. But now, it's time to face the harsh reality that is my Love is coming back in a few hours, we're not talking, we have a class together this semester, school starts this week, and I still feel the same. Now ain't that about a bitch.
I'm So Sorry. But I Love You ♥

Accidents >..< Painful

I know i haven't blogged in a while and that's due to the fact that I haven't really had much to say other than I miss my love, my family came to visit and my brother brought me a shot glass and a badass pipe, the McFatFuck is moving out, and I've been working out a lot. But finally, something rather interesting happened. I was out running an 8mile and during about my 6th mile I get hit by a car. I'm a rather small person weighing only about 114-120lbs so I got flung into the air and hit the ground. You would think I should have been on the ground in pain and the person in the car would have gotten out to check on me and be crying out of fear of my possible death, hospitalization, or lawsuit; however, instead I decided to not make a scene and keep running. I didn't even look back to see if the car stopped. You can call it a hit and run xp After I was hit I got up and ran so why not xD It's not the first time I've been hit by a car. I use to do BMX, rollerblading, skateboarding, and I'm also a runner so in my life time I believe I've been hit about 6 times. As I casualty to to a friend about it on a status, my love decides to text me about it trying to be all worried and shit even though we haven't talked in about a week because I was told I was no longer cared for. I ignored the messages. It hurts to do so, but I don't know what else to do. Being in love with someone you can't have sucks ass and is way more painful than getting hit by a car and an 8mile run. So what will happen when my love comes back and school starts. We have Dance 101 together so I don't know what I will do.
I Still Love You ♥